the story

There is a story behind every staff number. Everyone is unique in their own sense and in the eyes of God. Trying not to view any individual as a number, but as a human being. As the saying goes, everyone is fighting their own battles. Be kind. Everyone may not be likeable, but everyone is human. There is a factor that must be considered, and somebody is always someone son, daughter, brother amd sister. How is anyone lower than each other if thats the case. Respect. Do the right thing, that has and always will be how we want to live out my life.

Home. Family, I really felt so much loved and familiarity these past few days. No doubt there were heavy thoughts and work distractions, but I am thankful for the times spent and precious memories. Lord that I pray may You grant my parents a good health and a safe flight back home. Lord I pray that may You watch over them and grant them journey mercy back home. My father is tired and has to work tomorrow. Lord I pray that You grant him strength to go through the flight and work for tomorrow. Lord I pray that You also watch over my mother as she is suffering from some throat irritation. Lord may You take care of her during the flight and I pray that the flight will be as comfortable as possible for them till they reach home safely.

Lord, I give thanks for all the divine arrangements you had for me for this period of time. Forgive me for being too greedy and not understanding your plans for me. I have suffered on my own accord but yet at times I am aware that You are with me. May I continue to grow in strength that You will find favour in my faith. Lord I pray thanks that I have spend as much time as possible with my parents. And I pray for strength to get me through and beyond this period of time. No doubt it may seem to me like it does not look good, Lord I pray that I get the strength to remind myself that my parents are already proud of me. That me being here is already an achievement by itself. Lord I pray that I count my blessings rather than counting my perceived losses. May I always be reminded of my blessings oh God. Lord, I pray for forgiveness that sometimes I find out why certain things did not turn out to be what I had planned or expected. But I know oh God that You are in control and that Your plans are better than mine. Lord I just can't be more thankful of all that You have planned for me. For a comfortable home to stay, a homely and warm feel of events that happened. For my father and mother. I give thanks for my cousin and her family. But I pray that may your grant their grandmother healing grace. That You will watch over them and protect them. May You bless the medical team taking care of her grandmother Lord. As I commit her into Your hands.

Lord I pray for strength to carry on. The spark and fire in me to move on and to find that energy in me to continue as much as I can with Your strength and grace. Lord I commit my life into your hands as I worship You. Jesus I love you. In Jesus precious name, Amen.

Lord, give me a reminder to be always grateful and thankful for all that I have. In a situation in this, I always fail to be able to know what is my present situation. I know that You always have a plan for me. Please Lord God, grant me the strength and trust to know Your plans are good for me.

In everything that I am, in everything that I have done, and everything that I have experienced, I know that everything happens for Your purpose. I pray oh God, that may You bless all my loved ones around me that they may not suffer for what I am doing. Is it selfish to achieve my goals that my loved ones may have to suffer? Lord I pray, for Your divine intervention.

Lord may I always be grateful of what I have. Let me recall and give thanks for everything that You have done for me. Lord, I need Your strength, and I pray that the Holy Spirit may intervene on my behalf as my soul rests. As I commit my life into Your hands, Amen.

Today is papa's birthday. I would like to wish my papa a happy blessed birthday and also a very healthy and a prosperous life ahead. He and my mother has brought up 2 boys and we are very happy as a family. 

Dear Father Lord, I just want to continue to put my trust and faith in You. In all that You do, I pray God, that may You continue to strengthen me. In days of dry spell and in places of the desert, I know You are there with me. Hope in You, that though I may not understand my circumstances, Lord I trust that everything is within Your plans. I believe and trust in Your Lord. I love You God. 

Happy birthday Papa. Love you.

In the midst of a dry season, I want to look up to You God. 

friends

It was a great weekend. A journey of self discovery and nothing was what I had planned. It was all God's plan. Friendship. That word always has a new meaning for me everyday. This weekend alone, I experienced a time zoom. Close friends from all phases of my life. The people whom we grew up together and become who we are today because of each other. Ranges from 8 years to 22 years. We talked about the past, the present and the future.

And time, become immaterial. It become so insignificant that we almost forgot how fast it went past our lives just like that.

It was great, it was indeed much to be thankful for. How we grew, how we are and how we want to be. We were there for each other during our milestones. The lows and the highs. And now what we are, journeying with each other in our phases of life.

When we looked back at our past, we saw our footsteps and those footsteps, gave me the strength to look forward to the way ahead and create more footsteps. Not just for my own, but with these people whom I can comfortably call family. Not in the sense of bloodline, but in the sense they have been around for each other and we can confidently count on one another. To share the joys. And sorrows should the need arises.

I am thankful for God whom He places His people in my life and placed me in their life too. For without them, I would never be able to see God more clearly than ever. I see my own reflection in these people. The people whom carries God lesson for me, and hopefully their own personal lessons in me also. It was indeed a huge providence. Something I have prayed and yet again, it has been answered 10 times what I had expected. In His time, in His glory at his exact and precise time.A weekend of meaning, and indeed the whole search for the meaning of life has become clearer.


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It has been an amazing 11 years since we first started off. Although it feels like we have come a long way, we are hardly halfway through. We still have a long way to go, to continue to build upon the friendship. The treasured memories and moments, boosting us into the future with strength and confidence that we have each other to count on. Even though we might have moved on with life in different directions, as a class, we too have moved on from being classmates to being a close knitted family. Family not just only involves bloodline, but the idea of just being present for each others joy and if the need arises, sorrows.

Every time there is a negative thought that flows through my mind, I am grateful that in search of His peace, I find His wisdom to bring me just enough out of the darkness. Not that I am out of the valley, but simply because my journey is not done yet. There are certain decisions I have made, but yet to be executed. Sometimes, when fear gives way to anger, it brings strength to my soul. Not because I want to be angry, but there has to be some form of fuel to burn, so that it powers up my mind and body to pull away from the darkness and into the light. Where the light leads to, I am not certain. But I know that it His grace will carry me through the journey once again.

I am where I am not because I was faithful, but because He has always been faithful.

Reflection

2010 vs 2014

How many years in between? It's 4 years. In a short 4 years, the waves of emotion is like a tsunami. Not because it was exciting, but because from the highest tip of the wave to the lowest level of the sea, is so great. How did things lead this way?

The environment? The work? The people? More often than not, it's the people. Ideals have changed, people have changed. For the better? I feel it's for their own individual better. Not exactly to help the entire community. But to help their individual self in the name of helping the entire community. Whether they see it this way, or see it the way that they are helping to improve the community is really impossible to tell. But to me, it seems clearly that they want to further their own career. The people who want to keep things improving are being shut out. What's left for me?

Can I carry on in a place that doesn't listen to what I say? Or makes a decision for me without asking me? Is it because of my pride? Or is it because I myself have ego issues just to stay on and try to attempt to prove myself? How do I survive in an environment that sometimes people infuse you with their optimism based on their ideals which you might not agree? Or with negativity that the old way works best.

The worst I've seen is people running down each other without telling each other. Especially if some are friends whom you care about. It's sickening to witness. And the worst part, it affects me too. Can I just shut out everything and continue to work like that?